“We
all need someone to look at us. We can be divided into four categories
according to the kind of look we with to live under.
The
first category longs for the look of an infinite number of anonymous eyes, in
other word, for the look of the public. That is the case with the German
singer, the American actress, and even the tall, stopped editor with the big
chin. He was accustomed to his readers, and when one day the Russians banned
his newspaper, he had the feeling that the atmosphere was suddenly a hundred
times thinner. Nothing could replace the look of unknown eyes. He thought he
would suffocate. Then one day he realized that he was constantly being followed
bugged, and surreptitiously photographed in the street. Suddenly he had
anonymous eyes on him and he could breathe again! He began making theatrical
speeches to the microphones in his wall.
The
second category is made up of people who have a vital need to be looked at by
many known eyes. They are the tireless hosts of cocktail parties and dinners. They
are happier than the people in the first category, who, when they lose their
public, have the feeling that the lights have gone out in the room of their
lives. This happens to nearly all of them sooner or later. People in the second
category, on the other hand, can always come up with the eyes they need.
Then
there is the third category, the category of people who need to be constantly
before the eyes of the person they love. Their situation is as dangerous as the
situation of people in the first category. One day the eyes of their beloved
will close, and the room will go dark.
And
finally there is the fourth category, the rarest, the category of people who
live in the imaginary eyes of those who are not present. They are the dreamers.
Franz, for example. He traveled to the borders of Cambodia only for Sabina. As
the bus bumped along the Thai road, he could feel her eyes fixed on him in a
long stare.”
Milan
Kundera “The Unbearable Lightness of Being”
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